Fear is the enemy of creativity.

What would I do if I wasn't afraid? I would post this.

So my blog has been sitting here silent for many months, not for lack of me wanting to write… But due to a sober commitment that follows this post I have not posted it quickly, or lightly.

I started writing the following post on holiday, at the beginning of July, you will understand at the end of this post why I am sharing it with you now.

Tuesday 3^rd July 2012

So I am doing my favourite thing: Sitting in a French bakery in the middle of Plett, tucking into a warm, moist Almond croissant and a pot of earl grey tea whilst French music rises and the smell of fresh pastry and coffee fills the air. I am in soul paradise.

This is day 5 of our little holiday and I have finally relaxed into holiday mode. To be honest, I could spend a whole week in the corner of this shop, directly adjacent to the old bookshelf. I could sit here for a week, writing, drinking and observing the populous as they come and so about their daily business. Today the young surfer-looking guy sitting opposite strikes me. He is mid-twenties (possibly younger) but his beard makes him hard to place. He has an iPhone 4 in his hand, a video game on the table and is drinking a can of coke. The level of which he looks out of place in this place makes me giggle. Clearly, unlike me, he is not here seeking refuge, rest, culture and a pauses in which too breathe in and reflect on life’s many complexities… He’s just thirsty. And that is ok, in fact, I kind of love that. I love that for some, food is sumptuous, romantic, and nostalgic even… And then for others it is simply necessity. Plett, unlike Jeffreys is “very me”. It is full of fabulous restaurants, old bookshops, stylish boutiques, cafes and people of all races. It has a European vibe that makes me feel instantly at home. I don’t feel guilty about my likes and dislikes when I am here. I relax in my English girl skin and breathe.

Now, reading this you may think I am shunning my life in JBay. I’m not. So where am I going with this?

I realise that there is a difference between being relaxed and being at peace. My soul relaxes here in Plett, but my spirit is completely at peace living in JBay because I know that is God’s place for us now. I can holiday in Plett and find soul rest, but if I were living here, now, I would quickly slip out of peace, because God has planted us in a family in JBay.

I can never thank God enough for calling us to Jeffreys Bay, for unlocking freedom, relationship and purpose for us here!

Being here has helped me learn to ask questions again and not be afraid to not have all the answers. That fear used to be a huge blocker to my writing – actually forget my writing – to my personhood. I can be too proud and too scared to put my self and my writing out there for fear of being wrong. And I am ending my journey with fear and intimidation; they have been companions for far too long.

Fear is the enemy of creativity. It is the enemy of you being able to LIVE your life. His life actually. Live the life; He has called you to live, fearlessly!

Thanks for stopping by, K x


This photo is from here via Pinterest